Mind your business
by Dokidokibear
Summary: Give me an opportunity and I will sprint away for my dear life faster than a freaked out super-spot billed duck! Maybe not that fast, but you can close your eyes for ten minutes and then pretend you are impressed, - Jarvis suggested. No, seriously, everyone around her was a freaking monster! She knew getting born on the Grand Line was a bad idea - but noone asked at the time.
1. Prologue

**AN**: nope, just kidding, no author notes.

* * *

"My dear parents,

Please do not worry yourself over my absence on your return. You might not have imagined, but my life on the island has started to become a tad bit too lonely for my liking. Taija and her family traveled back to North Blue at last, leaving me with no adequate company as of November this year. The sequenced departures of you and my beloved friend took its toll on me. I am bored, if you will. In a desperate attempt to fight this feeling, I am planning to follow on your footsteps, from now on. Don't get the wrong idea, by any means I am not implying anything agriculture related! I am talking travelling here and while I do understand that "travel" and "agriculture" stand in the same line for you - seeing as your travels are an unavoidable part of your business, they certainly do not mean the same to me. Think about it as if I am treating myself to a Christmas present.  
The Grumpy Phil helped me greatly when I voiced my concerns on the transportation issue. Not only did he give me his old and trustworthy boat, but also – or should I say "I tried not to intervene in the process too much", made a number of improvements to it. The boat is now more than reasonably suitable for long distanced travels along the Grand Line.  
I shall be back not later than mid-spring, as my plans only include travelling through islands of the second row. Three and a half months are more than enough time, but knowing I lack in experience, I tried to foresee possible problems.  
Once again, please don't worry about me, as well as don't get overworked and don't forget to eat three times a day.  
With hopes to see you on her return,  
Your loving daughter,

Jarvis".

That was the first written words Jarvis, filled with pathos and enthusiasm, as almost every other sixteen years old, has ever left behind, many to follow.  
The older she grew – the shorter and messier notes got, until at the age of sweet nineteen she left her parents' home with a few words, written in a hurry.

"A bigger job. Leaving for a very long time. For God's sake don't forget to eat dinner! Every day, if possible."- it said.


	2. Chapter 1: of news and memories

**AN**: The last one was prologue, but this one is prologue too? Say what!

* * *

Jarvis often wondered after, if there was a shooting star of sorts passing by on the night she wished for something so stupid. She had no other way to explain the

mystery of her staying alive, while getting bogged down in the whole New Era shit, with no monster powers backing her up. Heck, with no powers at all! She barely

could have lifted anything heavier than Lil' Karu, never saw a Devil Fruit and the only involvement she had with Haki was when someone tried to punch her.

Unfortunately, after her life-turning, eyes-opening Alabasta experience, it started to happen too often for her liking. She should have known her idea meant troubles –

she always knew, right? After all it was her job to know and write about the finest of news happening because of or to the pirates in Paradise. And what is the better

way to write about things then to first see them for yourself?

At first, when she got a job, Jarvis tried to find herself as far from the source of troubles, as possible – her motto was "Better safe than sorry" and she kept in mind,

that her chances to be injured, killed or traumatized in any way, were getting disturbingly high the closer she was to the subject of news. Besides, she was asked to

write opinions, not news themselves. But her writings were lacking this little something and in order not to lose her job, she started to find herself in the midst of the

piracy chaos more often with every passing day, trembling in fear and closing her eyes at the especially violent scenes. The quality improved drastically, but the level of

sarcasm and snarkiness in the word choosing, she prouded herself on before, decreased.

It looked like a vicious circle to her, but The Knower, named so not for nothing, knew better. His decision was what brought Jarvis to Alabasta a littleunder two weeks

ago.

The country was through and through soaked with tension and whispers, and disappointing feeling of betrayal, but Jarvis saw in eyes of natives a silent

estrangement. She was an outsider, she was not supposed to care and she surely was not expected to understand.

But there Jarvis was, as ready to care and understand, as she was to hide and run at the sight of danger.

The heat dulled her feelings for all time she traveled to Alubarna and only it was there that Jarvis started to hear the rustle of her panic again, coming from somewhere

deep down inside. It was the only sound she heard clearly in next few days, town filled with the soothing lull. On the fourth day the king went mad – or so Jarvis

thought – and the hell broke loose. The sounds came all at once: cries of people and their weapons, praying, breathing, swearing... She was hiding by herself near the

place of main battle, when it happened. The desperate anger of rebels was so hypnotizing that at one moment Jarvis was not able to look away anymore, wrapped by

the agony of the slumber slaughter that was taking place on the central city square. The new turn of history was unwrapping before her eyes and Jarvis was pretty

sure she was contemplating the idea to join. The battle stopped as abruptly, as it has started. The rain, the princess, the end of nightmare –everything turned into a

vivid memory.

The same night she realized: her dream was no longer to get out from the boredom of her island.

She was travelling back and forth the Grand Line for last four eyes, working at what someone could call "the front line" for the last year - she did it, she escaped the

everyday routine. Now, she wanted to stop closing eyes, when watching a bloody battle, to intake the world around her with every breath, see the history for herself

and maybe - share it with others. Now, she wanted to be brave – and very lucky.

Despite the independency her job gave her from World-Pirates conflict, most pirates still didn't care she was a reporter, ready to kill her any time, and the Government

was not willing to accept the freedom of speech in its' meaning, ready to shut her up and edit her out.

The said freedom of speech was supposed to give well, freedom, but when it came down to press, everyone knew it was only to a certain extent. Anything under this

lovely bright blue sky that had to do with opinion voicing had its' limits. Under the penname of Bjorn she thought she was pushing these limits before, in her own

opinion column in the Grand Line Weekly Times, but now she saw it was clearly not enough. She had more things to say - she needed to say them, and when The

Knower, who saw through each and every one of his subordinates, hinted she can try to send, maybe, sometimes, some write ups to the Daily Times, Jarvis jumped on

the opportunity gratefully.

- I will take on that, - she told him.

- Not feeling like a lazy ass today, aren't we? – The Knower mocked her approvingly. That set the deal.

Around the same time she formed her newly found sort-of-purpose in life, the troubles came to the Paradise: the Worst Generation started to rise, and Jarvis, following

her wish, was questionably honored to closely follow their histories to the New Era and beyond. What she failed to notice was that she scored herself one too.


	3. Chapter 2: of sweets and meetings

Jarvis sailed off the morning a new daily newspaper plumped into her cereals, splashing milk and news all over her. She fished it out and skipped first pages, still going

mad about Alabasta.

- The mysterious defeat of a Big-Time Rookie; Bellamy the Hyena is mocked down, - she read loudly.

- The Hyena, huh? – Lil' Karu repeated unenthusiastically. The Pirates were not her profile and they were eww. The Reverie was something much more honourable, on

the other hand, so she too was not ready yet to divert her attention onto something else, - what do they mean "mocked down"?

Jarvis ran her eyes through the article quickly.

- Ah, Rio is punning again. Bellamy was knocked out in one punch in Mock Town.

- He should just stop, - Karu waved her spoon menacingly, knowing well Rio would neither hear nor listen to her, - Are you going to write on that?

- There is not much information on the incident. If I want to write about it, I will need to get back to Jaya today.

- Sounds like a plan, - Karu shrugged indifferently. Grand Line Times had some miniature dormitories for staff on Jaya, so for both of them it was a great excuse to visit

the place they were calling one of their homes – and to sleep in a proper bed for ones. Besides, her boat was decked in Mock Town - she was travelling with Jarvis for

time being, so that left Karu with no options.

Although poorly comparable to the heat of Alabasta, it was the hottest midday on Jaya ever. Well, maybe not, but for Jarvis it sure felt like so – only thin dresses were

protecting her and Lil' Karu's dignity; and the swimsuits underneath, mind you. But if Jarvis was thinking only about getting to the shower after their safe-but-salt-in-

your-face travel, Lil' Karu wanted nothing more than something sweet. The next thing Jarvis faced, was that Karu managed to find a hawker's stand and was, indeed,

buying… Are that jelly beans?

Jarvis was not sure what was more amazing – the fact that the ones Karu bought were not a melted mess or that Karu bought jelly beans. In a Mock Town. Right

when and where she wanted them. This girl was a wonder.

But she still was much younger than most of them in the newspaper were – frankly, she was a child. They were almost out of port, when – it was destined to happen –

Lil' Karu dropped her precious purchase. Jarvis had to give her credits, thought. Not a cry-baby, but instead a pragmatic person in times of troubles, she instantly went

on her knees to collect every last jelly bean.

- Karu, you can't eat what fell down! – Jarvis squatted next to her, watching carefully for Karu's hands not to be next to her mouth and eventually starting to collect

jellies too. Colourful, they were shining as jewels in the sun. Jarvis eyed them suspiciously. Were they even edible, to begin with? She made a mental note to read

later about jelly beans production. – What are you going to do with them?

- Put them on my table for now, - Karu met an uneasy gaze Jarvis gave her and explained with a sigh, - since they are pretty. And Bunny will eat them later.

Oh, riiight, Karu and her rationales.

But something was wrong.

- Bunny can't eat what fell down too.

- Really? – Karu, for once, seemed genuinely surprised, but Jarvis doubted her pure intentions - I thought she liked all things colourful.

- She still can't eat it, - Jarvis stated firmly, but noticing the girl has started to sulk, softened, - You can still give to her some later.

She will just have to tell Bunny not to eat them .

And now she understood what was wrong.

Everything Karu bought and had not eaten (and boy, had she bought a lot!), she managed to drop almost in the centre of the busy port street, so naturally two –

mainly Jarvis - were cursed and pushed countless times during their little collecting sessions. But the stream of righteous anger ran short, too short for a busy port

street. Jarvis lifted her head. People around her were not really around anymore, as if an invisible ice-breaker was making its way through the crowd, dividing it into

two flows. She looked a bit further up the street.

"Aaand now we have an ice breaker himself", - Jarvis thought. The Mad Monk Urouge, a recent addition to the Super Rookies team, was making his way through the

port, his crew following him behind. They made a decent procession. A decent, but very dangerous too.

- Jarvis, are you listening? – Karu bugged her from the jelly beans world, lifting her head to face the reality too - Hm?

And then Urouge, who was coming closer with every step – too close for Jarvis liking - looked not ahead, in undefined faraway lands, but right at them. He casted a

quick glance to the Karu and stared at Jarvis, their gazes met. It was not even for a second, but Jarvis found that she is no longer frozen solid from her heart and to

the tips of her fingers. So she grabbed the most valuable thing (it happened to be Karu) and Karu grabbed hers (it happened to be jelly beans), and ran. Because that

was what she saw in his eyes: "Get out of my way in two seconds and you will live longer than that".

- Oopsies,- she said on her way of sprinting out.

What a conversation starter.

- That was a close call, - she breathed out, after making sure the opportunity to become a fresh warm corpse passed.

- Put me down, that's embarrassing, - Karu squished her cheeks, - now, you look like a fish.

- I look better than a fish, - Jarvis protested, freeing her face and letting Karu on the ground.

- Na-ah, you are just plain! – Girl seemed to be absolutely unaffected by the latest meeting and Jarvis envied her immunity to all things stressful. The Knower knew

what he was doing, when he added a child to the team.

But she had a point, when Jarvis faced Urouge she indeed felt plain, as never before. And it was not because of his enormous sizes – although his size was fascinating

and Jarvis estimated he could fit twelve Karu's inside him – it was more about the way he presented himself. Was it his stature or the look on his face? Probably both.

She needed to work on that too.

- Don't think you look plain, compared to him, - warned her Lil' Karu, easily predicting her thoughts - you _just_ look plain.

- Thanks for your kind words, - Jarvis smiled venomously, but not really aggressively. At this point it didn't even hurt – envious by her nature she used to get jealous

over better looking people, but Karu's constant overly harsh remarks dulled the feelings.

Because overall, Jarvis was okay with how she looked - wasn't that enough? A bit bony from all the times she forgot to eat, she still had two legs and two hands. Her

hair was dry from all the salt and sun, but the later bleached it to the nice yellowish-white colour. The other way round, her skin, once pale, became golden with the

tan, with dark pigment spots here and there. She had no scars and no deformations and she remembered well what Rio said to her, when she got upset about Karu's

words for the n'teenth time: "Well, I admit you do look plain, but that's only until you open that mouth of yours, slapping your beautiful shit right in the face of whoever

you are talking too".

That wasn't exactly a mood lifting comment at the moment, but later she had to agree - personality ruled.

The dormitories were on the outskirts of the town, bordering with forest on one side, and the way there took some time. At first Jarvis, as every other newcomer,

couldn't understand – why Jaya, why Mock Town? Yes, many news were born here, but the island was a bit too piratic for her liking. It was later she understood the

relative safety the place gave to them – there were _so_ many pirates that if they started to attack and kill citizens on a daily basis, no one would had been left to buy

things from. Of course, staff of the Grand Line Times had nothing to do with the business here, but the pirates were not bound to know that.

They walked in silence, Karu too tired and Jarvis too busy listening to the chatter around. The strangest thing was – there were almost no mentions of Bellamy. She

even stopped to buy the water, so she can have a small talk and ask a few innocent questions, but the only thing she was now sure about is that no one knew who

did it. The pirates who saw it left the next morning and there were no citizens around at the late hour of Bellamy's downfall. The Rio hasn't mentioned anything in his

article too.

They reached the dormitories and Jarvis still had nothing to write about. The possible column was slipping away and she had no other choice, but to shower and read

through the newspaper again, in hopes to get a brilliant idea. The dormitories were a bit too noisy, though, so with newspaper reading Jarvis opted for the calmer

beach – it was another quarter hour walk through the forest, but there was no danger of pirates. Karu tagged along.

Jarvis got bored re-reading the articles very soon, so she dumped the newspaper and was now lying on her stomach, pretending to be a seal. The sun was not so hot

now and the Jaya was slowly coming back to her spring self.

- I can't believe the Knower gave a green light to your latest write up.

Jarvis turned her head slightly and stared at the noise source.

- It's delightful to see you again, Bertha.

A tall dark-haired woman was now spreading out her towel on the sand, right next to where Jarvis was.

- Why are you always looking for troubles? – Both worry and condemnation were clear in her voice.

- Well, troubles are never looking for me, so I thought I'd make a first move, - Jarvis buried her nose back into sand, towel a bit too short for her.

- It was not the _first_ time you wrote something so provocative!

- Berthaa! No one reads my column more then once. You are the only person I know, who finds _all_ my hidden implications - even the non-existing ones.

- You will get it hard one day, remember my words.

- Maybe I want to? – grumbled Jarvis, annoyed.

- You obviously had a happy unburdened childhood, haven't you? - So what if she did?

- Hey Aunty Berthy, maybe today is the day? – Lil' Karu jumped on her towel, splattering cold water droplets around.

- Augh, get away, wet puppy!

- What do you mean, sweety?

Both asked at the same time, but Jarvis' request was ignored and forgotten.

- We bumped into Mad Monk Urouge today in the port, - solemnly announced the girl, - He is sooo big.

- Jaaarvis?!

- _WHAT_? Why do you make my name sound, as if you are about to accuse me in some horrible wrongdoings?

- Because I am going to do just that!

- In seeing the Mad Monk, really? Do you think I was specifically looking for a chance to cut my life short?

- But you _were_ in port…

- For Gods' sake, Bertha, we returned on Jaya today, of course we were in port.

- … and you just said you look for troubles.

- "I can write about that" troubles, not the Super Rookies kind! I am planning to live a long life, thank you very much.

- I doubt you will.

- Long live the king! – blurted Lil' Karu out of nowhere and the argument was closed.

But Jarvis was fated to not find any calmness later too. In the middle of the night, her den den mushi woke her up. The Knower sounded disgustingly cheerful.

- How do you fair, Bjorn?

- Mm, - Jarvis muttered, - do you even sleep?

He ignored her question.

- We got a lot of calls, saying the red-haired devil appeared at Romuda island.

- They better call exorcists then.

- Some also said he came on the pirate ship.

How well she knew what he was about to get her into…

- About ten minutes ago we lost the connection with our reporter, who happened to be nearby.

And was it deadly dangerous!

-Rio is on his way there and you should hurry too. I can sense it in the air - we are about to see the rise of a new pirate star!


	4. Chapter 3: of travels and fictions

**AN: **Made first chapter easier on the text, what a jungle it was before!

* * *

It was not even sunrise, when Jarvis, yawning every minute, set her boat on a course to the next route. The parallel log poses, reporters adopted from marines, did

wonders, allowing to change routes at the will. With notes about faster ways to travel between islands they partially stole ("borrowed" – everyone insisted) and

partially made themselves, it was possible to always have a hand on the pulse of everyday life.

However the resolve to do so, Jarvis got a hold of a few days earlier, was slowly dying in her. She was too sleepy for pirates, world and life in general, and it turned

out that counting clouds was not helping. On the contrary, Jarvis discovered how calming counting things can be, falling asleep for a moment or maybe longer – she

opted for pretending it never happened. She tried to read something, but that made her forget about keeping an eye on the log pose and she almost missed a

moment, when the route changed and it was time to turn the boat towards her final destination.

The journey was coming to an end and the day was brightening up, when the Knower spoiled her mood once again.

- Bjorn, you are changing the route, _now_.

- What? - Jarvis wasn't tuning in,- I am going to the Romuda, you asked me, remember?

- Forget about it, we just got a word from Rio – this guy wiped out an entire village, _every single living being, _goddamnit Bjorn. That's why the calls stopped. He has

already left, so you better get the hell out of his way. Write later a brief overview on Romuda crisis, don't go yourself. Questions?

- Whoa,- croaked Jarvis, a bit overwhelmed,- is Rio.. okay?

She wanted to say "alive", but the word got stuck in her suddenly dry throat.

- Don't worry, you know he can.. hide, - that was relieving, for once.

- Who in the world…, - she stuttered, - who was that guy anyway?

- We are not planning to send you to catch up with him anytime soon, - the words were followed by an unenthusiastic chuckle, - hopefully you will never have to see

him in person, not to mention meeting him. Name Eustass Kidd, can bet my horse he will get a bounty over a hundred million soon, if not this week. Jabbering aside, I

hope your cute little boat is already sailing in a direction about ninety degrees different to the one before. I think rather than returning to the Jaya, the route on the

other side comes closer right now, understood?

She checked if she did. Understanding was perfect and Jarvis cleared her throat.

- Understood, - she reported and proceeded with changing the course, not failing to listen.

- Good. I am going to contact others - some of our folks are on the route too. Cheers.

- I was the closest one, wasn't I, - Jarvis muttered to her den den mushi, but then remembered Rio and suddenly felt incredibly lucky, guilty and glad – she did prefer to

have a head and a spoiled mood over having no head and no mood to spoil.

There was no sleepiness anymore to talk about and a map told her Jammer island was her new goal. Jarvis paid attention only to the first part of it, thought.

"Yep", - it made her think, - "A toast with a jam sounds just right". Eating was the most beautiful part of her day - when she was not forgetting about it.

The rest of her sailing went smoothly and she soon was docking her boat, ready to stretch her legs on the streets. "Pava" – reminded her with a town name the huge

sign. Now that Jarvis thought about it, she was here before. It was a peaceful autumn island, famous for its delicious berries and fruits, and last time she spent here a

wonderful day. It was before she got her job, though - all days then were wonderful.

It still was peaceful, but not in a way she remembered it – it was over the top now and seemed a little bit off. Jarvis, walking up the hill, haven't seen anyone at all, be

it a human or an animal. It was as if everyone disappeared at once, leaving everything behind, untouched.

"Wiped out an entire village, _every single living being_", - ringed The Knowers' words in her ears. Jarvis shivered, but it was another route and another island – she was

pretty sure about it – so it had to be something else. Besides, she associated "wiping out a village" with a bloody mess, not with clean empty streets.

- Have they started a siesta tradition or what? – she muttered to herself, not expecting an answer, but still got one.

- What are you – dumb, dumbass? Of course it is a siesta.

A short boy, tanned from toes to hair so strangely that at first Jarvis thought he was dirty, was pointing at her accusingly from the side of the street. She stared at him,

waiting for him to continue.

- It's mantou… man do… - the boy was getting annoyed, - mandori! Yes, it's a mandori siesta.

- Mandori..? – slowly repeated Jarvis, - You mean mandarin?

She never heard of mandarin siesta, but hey, everything had a right to exist.

- Wha.. what? Why mandarin? You are dumbass, you are really a dumbass! It's mandori! And you should do it too.

Jarvis blinked.

- Oooh, mandatory! – the understanding finally downed on her, - Why are you not inside then?

- Of course that's because I was following you to tell you about it. I saw you through the window.

- You should have told me this straight away, - Jarvis furrowed her brows, - but siesta, really? How come there is now such a thing here?

The boy instantly opened his mouth to tell her something and Jarvis almost heard an "Of course that's because" that was about to escape his lips, but he closed it

instead and stayed silent for a good minute.

- Why would I know? - he finally said, turning on his heels, - Just get inside.

Jarvis obediently inspected the surrounding area. There were plenty of houses around, but she had this feeling no one was going to let her in.

Oh, - the boy looked back at her once more, - There are famous pirates in the town too, so hurry up.

"And why has he told me that?!" – Jarvis howled mentally. Her next thought, bold and clear, was "stop, drop and roll away" but deep down she understood there were

no stopping and no turning back for her - not even hiding inside will do now that she heard about pirates. The boy didn't tell her who they were, but if he knew,

chances were high she knew too.

So the only thing left was to move to the side of the street in the shadow of walls, and fasten her walk. Jarvis was hoping to decide on her next move at the central

square: that time she visited Pava it was a food market there and the place smelled funny, and she tried these strange small pears that turned out to be sweet and

spicy, but really good, and wait! Jarvis stopped in her tracks for a moment. Why was she going there again?

"Riiight, the roads", - she hit her forehead with a finger twice, concentrating. The place was a junction of sorts, all streets starting from there. Armed with the first step

of a plan on "how to create a masterpiece of an article and not to die", she was ready to indulge in other mind speculations.

"Good thing it could not be the guy from Romuda", - Jarvis reasoned with herself, trying to think positively. But that was the only good thing she came up with. After

that it was turn of the bad things and first of all she accepted that there were still plenty of pirates out there, ready to kill her without her saying "please". Another

rather unpleasant moment was that boy said "pirates too". Jarvis suspected that if the pirates would prove to be not enough to kill her, this other thing would make

sure she will not survive today. He coouuuld have mean "you are in the town and pirates too", but Jarvis was an overthinking type, always ready to believe in the

beast and be prepared, rather than not – and then run away from one in surprise and fear.

She was in the midst of imagining another sea king with short legs that was mincing through the town, searching and finding a defenseless human like her, when she

finally saw the central place at the end of the street. Her imaginary mainland née sea king cared not and was preparing to eat her.

"Hisss", - he said, getting ready for lunch, - "I will devour you, foolish human!"

At this moment three things happened at once.

Jarvis stepped on the central square.

- Foolish humans, - hissed someone for real, echoing her thoughts.

And her head became no longer attached to her body.

-Oh come ooooon, - she snapped, ditching thoughts about the monsters, - I thought I would survive at least for another hour!


End file.
